HBR : Peter Bregman :A Simple Communication Mistake to Avoid

A Simple Communication Mistake to Avoid

Eleanor and I were fast asleep at my parents' house in upstate New York when my five-year-old daughter Sophia came running in.
"Look out the window!" she screamed, as she pulled on our shades. I looked at my watch: 6 a.m. Not bad.
Sophia was jumping with excitement as the shade opened, revealing about a foot of new powder.
"Let's go skiing!"
A few hours later, I stood with Sophia and her eight-year-old sister, Isabelle, at the top of an intermediate slope we had all skied many times. But this time was different. Northeastern powder is not the light, fluffy stuff of the West. It's heavy and hard to ski, especially when you weigh 45 pounds.
Isabelle struggled but managed to navigate the new conditions. Sophia, on the other hand, fell almost immediately. She laughed, got up, and started again. A few feet down the slope, she fell once more. Again, laughing, she got up. Now Isabelle started laughing too.
But not me. I was worried. This was too much for Sophia. She might get hurt. And her ski class started in 15 minutes. At this rate she would never make it.
I shouted a few words of encouragement and advice. But her laughter was making it hard for her to ski. Was she falling on purpose? Because it was fun?
I stayed behind her so I could help when she fell, but I was becoming increasingly frustrated. I yelled at her to stop playing around. But she kept falling and laughing.
I looked at the time. "Sophia!" I shouted. "Come on, stop fooling around. It's not funny. We're going to miss class."
"I'm trying," she yelled back.
I paused for a moment, looked up, and took a deep breath. The beauty of the snow-covered trees was incredible. And that's when I finally realized: I'm an idiot.
Here was my awesome five-year-old having an outdoor experience I want to encourage. And even though it was hard and scary and challenging, she was handling it gracefully, having the time of her life. And how did I help? By yelling at her.
It seems obvious now. But at the time my response felt perfectly natural. Which is the point, actually. It felt natural because it reflected how I was feeling. My own fears and frustrations and goals.
My mistake? I forgot that the situation wasn't about me. I forgot to focus on the needs of my audience, in this case a five-year-old skiing powder for the first time. That's presentation and communication skills 101.
I would never make the same mistake if I were giving a speech or working with a client. In other words, if I were thinking.
In the heat of the moment, it's easy to skip the thinking part. An employee comes to us with substandard work and we get angry. But is that really going to help the employee do better work next time? If the reason for the poor performance was that the employee didn't care, and my anger frightened him into caring more, then maybe. But poor performance is rarely caused by lack of fear. It's usually because of a misunderstanding or lack of capability. In which case asking questions would almost certainly be more helpful.
That's hard to do because when we're angry, we respond with anger. And when we're frustrated, we respond with frustration. It makes perfect sense.
It's just that it doesn't work and it won't help.
The solution is simple: When you have a strong reaction to something, take a deep breath and ask yourself a single question: what's going on for the other person?
Then, based on your answer, ask yourself one more question: What can I do or say that will help them?
In other words, don't start from where you are, start from where they are. What do they need in that moment? Some advice? A story about what you did in a similar situation? Perhaps just an empathetic ear? Or maybe simply some patience.
Imagine your favorite employee — the one you spent all that time developing — told you she was thinking of leaving your team for another job offer. You might feel angry and betrayed, but would it help to get angry at her? No, you'd be better off asking questions about what's working and what's not.
Once I realized my mistake, I got angry at myself for almost stomping out Sophia's enthusiasm.
But I didn't beat myself up for long. I took a few deep breaths and just watched her. She skied a few feet, fell, laughed, got up, and started skiing again.
Watching her laughing at her mistakes reminded me not to take myself so seriously. It turns out that meeting people where they are doesn't just help them. Sometimes it helps you too.
http://s.hbr.org/hiezx9

Banking Workshop by Mr. Nitesh Gawade, a SIMSREE Alumnus

We at SIMSREE were privileged to host a workshop on Banking conducted by Mr. Nitesh Gawade, a 2008 alumnus of SIMSREE. Mr. Gawade is the founder of Edify Solutions. The workshop was conducted in two sessions of four hours each and was intended to apprise students of the various profiles available in the banking domain and the skill set required for each such profile as well as the expectations of employers. This was applicable to five specializations, namely, Finance, Marketing, Human Resources, Operations and Systems.

Day 1 of the workshop saw two topics being covered-Basic Banking and Banking Systems. Basic Banking started with the fundamental functions of banks and then moved on Retail Banking and Corporate Banking. Job profiles and responsibilities in these domains were clearly mapped out. The career path one might expect to follow here was also traced. Banking Systems covered a wide variety of topics-ATM, ECS, Internet Banking, IT Infrastructure, Core Banking, CRM, Business Intelligence and Data Warehousing. Again, we were made aware of the various roles open to us and the responsibilities associated with the same. The skill set needed in such a position was also touched upon.

Day 2 saw a wider variety of topics which were covered by Mr. Gawade’s colleagues.  The session opened with a briefing on Treasury Process and Systems by Ms. Dhruvi Vora (again a 2008 alumnus of SIMSREE!). Treasury Mid Office i.e. Treasury Operation were covered by Mr. Gaurav Chheda. The session concluded with a summary of various Banking Profiles and skill set requirements by Mr. Gawade.

It was indeed a very interesting and informative session and cleared many misconceptions in the minds of students regarding Banking. We hope to host many more such educational sessions in future.

HBR: Peter Bregman : The Right Way to Respond to Failure

My wife Eleanor and I were visiting some friends on a Saturday when their nine-year-old daughter, Dana*, came home. She was close to tears, barely holding it together.
"Oh sweetie," her mom said. "What happened at the swim meet?"
Dana is an excellent swimmer. She trains hard, arriving at swim practice by six most mornings and swimming some afternoons as well. And her efforts are rewarded; she often wins her events, scoring points for her swim team. It is clear she is very proud of these wins.
It isn't like that for all her endeavors. She struggles with some subjects in school, doing extra math homework to keep up with the other kids and getting special help with her reading. But she always works hard.
"I was disqualified," she told us. She swam the race well, but dove in a fraction of a second before the starting gun went off: a false start.
We were in the foyer of the house and she sat down on the bottom stair of the staircase, her swim bag still on her shoulder, staring into space, almost expressionless.
"Honey," her dad said, "there are a lot more swim meets in the season. You'll have other chances to win."
I told her, "The fact that you left the block prematurely means you were at your edge. You're trying not to waste a millisecond in hesitation. That's the right instinct. You misjudged the timing but that's OK. The more you do this, the better you'll get at it."
"Every swimmer on every team has been disqualified at some point," Eleanor said. "It's part of the sport."
"I'm sure your coach will help you practice your starts before the next meet," her mom said, "and you'll figure out exactly when to spring off the block so that you don't waste a second but you don't dive too early either. You'll get it."
Nothing we said seemed to have any impact on her. Nothing changed her expressionless stare. Nothing helped.
Then her grandmother Mimi walked over.
We were all standing over Dana, when Mimi moved through us and sat down next to her. She put her arm around Dana and just sat there quietly. Eventually, Dana leaned her head on Mimi's shoulder. After a few moments of silence Mimi kissed Dana's head and said, "I know how hard you work at this, honey. It's sad to get disqualified."
At that point, Dana began to cry. Mimi continued to sit there, with her arm around Dana, for several minutes, without saying anything.
Eventually Dana looked up at Mimi, wiped her tears, and said, simply, "Thanks Mimi." And I thought, every leader, every manager, every team member, should see this.
All of us except Mimi missed what Dana needed.
We tried to make her feel better by helping her see the advantage of failure, putting the defeat in context, teaching her to draw a lesson from it, and motivating her to work harder and get better so it doesn't happen again.
But she didn't need any of that. She already knew it. And if she didn't, she'd figure it out on her own. The thing she needed, the thing she couldn't give herself, the thing that Mimi reached out and gave her?
Empathy.
She needed to feel that she wasn't alone, that we all loved her and her failure didn't change that, She needed to know we understood how she was feeling and we had confidence that she would figure it out.
I wanted every leader, manager, and team member to see that, because the empathetic response to failure is not only the most compassionate, it's also the most productive.
Empathy communicates trust. And people perform best when they feel trusted.
When I sit with you in your mistake or failure without trying to change anything, I'm letting you know that you're okay, even when you don't perform. And, counter-intuitively, feeling okay about yourself — when you fail — makes you feel good enough to get up and try again.
Most of us miss that. Typically, when people fail, we blame them. Or teach them. Or try to make them feel better. All of which, paradoxically, makes them feel worse. It also prompts defensiveness as an act of self-preservation. (If I'm not okay after a failure, I'd better figure out how to frame this thing so it's not my failure.)
Our intentions are fine; we want the person to feel better, to learn, to avoid the mistake again. We want to protect our teams and our organizations.
But the learning — the avoidance of future failures — only comes once they feel okay about themselves after failing. And that feeling comes from empathy.
Thankfully, the expression of empathy is fairly simple. When someone has made a mistake or slipped up in some way, just listen to them. Don't interrupt, don't offer advice, don't say that it will be all right. And don't be afraid of silence. Just listen.
And then, after some time, reflect back what you heard them say, what you feel they're feeling. That's it.
I said simple, not easy. It's hard to just listen and reflect back. It's hard not to give advice or solve a problem. Hard, but worth the effort.
After some time, Dana got up from the stairs, we all had dinner, and then she went to watch some TV.
We were talking in the living room when she came in to say good night.
"How are you feeling?" I asked her.
"OK, I guess." She shrugged. "I'm still bummed."
I almost told her not to worry, that it would be OK, that she would feel better in the morning, that there was always the next race, that she had lots of time to practice.
Almost.
"I understand," I told her. "It's a bummer."

*Names and some details changed
http://blogs.hbr.org/bregman/2011/03/the-right-way-to-respond-to-fa.html

HBR: State of Cost of Capital in Corporate Finance:A must read for all Finance people.

http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2011/03/why_sit_on_all_that_cash_us_fi.html

Vinay Bhatia : Lessons in Marketing Excellence.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3WTYs9mX2c

Economist :A Year In review

Welcome to the world this year
A summary of the world's main events from The Economist.
Also available at http://news.economist.com/cgi-bin1/DM/t/eCTmc0bQUuc0BTxN0KHN70Ew



- IN THE ECONOMIST THIS YEAR -


High levels of public debt among countries in the EURO ZONE turned into
a full-blown crisis for the currency block. As markets began to lose
confidence in the ability of a few countries to finance their debt, and
rapidly pushed up their borrowing costs, the European Union and the IMF
eventually resolved to bail out GREECE and, later, IRELAND. Investors
also fretted over Spain and Portugal. Measures to tackle BUDGET
DEFICITS were met with protests, especially in Greece, which endured
strikes and riots. In FRANCE 1m people demonstrated against pension
reforms in a single day.

As Europe tightened its fiscal belt, America passed more stimulus
measures. Barack Obama also signed into law the most sweeping changes
to America's FINANCIAL-REGULATORY SYSTEM since the 1930s and a
HEALTH-CARE REFORM ACT that was hailed by many as America's most
significant piece of social legislation since the 1960s. Conservatives
challenged the act in the courts.

Unease about deficits and the "jobless recovery" were factors behind
the increasing clout of TEA-PARTIERS in America. With their support the
Republicans scored a sensational win in a special election for Ted
Kennedy's former Senate seat in MASSACHUSETTS. November's MID-TERM
ELECTIONS saw the Democrats swept from power in the House by the
biggest swing to the Republicans in decades. Congress ended the year on
its lowest-ever Gallup approval rating--13%.

In CHINA the main worry was of an overheating economy. The central bank
unexpectedly raised interest rates for the first time in three years
amid concerns about inflation. Official trade statistics showed China
had overtaken Germany as the world's BIGGEST EXPORTER. Tensions over
CURRENCY POLICY were at the forefront during summits of the G20 and
IMF.

GOOGLE had a spat with China over censorship and a cyber-attack on its
website there, causing it to redirect its Chinese internet searches
through Hong Kong. Separately, Google, Facebook and others promised to
do more to protect PRIVACY after an outcry about their handling of
users' personal data.

THE YEAR OF LIVING DANGEROUSLY

An earthquake in HAITI was a humanitarian disaster, killing at least
230,000 people and leaving 1m homeless. The quake devastated
Port-au-Prince and left swathes of the country's fragile infrastructure
in ruins. A deadly outbreak of cholera later in the year and political
unrest compounded the misery.

Drifting ash clouds emanating from a VOLCANO in Iceland led to the
closure of European air space for several days, causing the biggest
disruption to worldwide air travel since September 11th 2001.

American combat operations ended in IRAQ, seven years after the start
of the war. Around 50,000 troops remain in a support role until the end
of 2011. Iraq continued to be troubled by violence and suicide-bombs
after the Americans departed. An election was held in March, though a
new government didn't begin to emerge until November.

The war in AFGHANISTAN rumbled on. Coalition troops mounted their
biggest offensive against the Taliban since 2001. The deaths of
civilians in targeted missile attacks aimed at the Taliban and al-Qaeda
caused rows. GENERAL STANLEY MCCHRYSTAL was sacked as commander of
coalition forces after a magazine published an interview in which he
disparaged the handling of the war by America's civilian leadership.
General David Petraeus took charge.

PAKISTAN endured another year of severe terrorist attacks, starting on
January 1st when a suicide-bomber killed 100 people at a volleyball
match. In July, the Pakistani Taliban claimed responsibility for huge
blasts at a Sufi shrine in Lahore and at a market in the tribal area.
Rioting in Karachi after the assassination of a politician killed
scores. Relentless FLOODING from exceptionally heavy monsoon rains
affected 20m people, adding to the country's woes.

Among the year's other deadliest terror attacks were co-ordinated
bombings at two crowded bars in Kampala, the UGANDAN capital. The
Shabab, a SOMALI Islamist militia, claimed responsibility.

THE HEAT IS ON

A spate of terrorist assaults in RUSSIA, including a suicide-bombing on
the Moscow metro, killed scores of people. Chechen separatists were
blamed. The hottest summer in Russian history resulted in hundreds of
WILDFIRES, causing a public-health crisis in Moscow when smoke
enveloped the city.

A spoof broadcast in GEORGIA claiming that Russia had invaded the
country caused panic. The bulletin, using imagery from the 2008
Russia-Georgia war, prompted people to flee Tbilisi, the capital.

After months of cajoling, ISRAEL and the PALESTINIANS sat around the
table for direct talks, though the negotiations soon broke down over
the building of Jewish settlements on the West Bank. The
American-Israeli relationship became somewhat strained.

Israeli intelligence was said to be behind the assassination of a
senior HAMAS military leader, who was killed at a hotel in Dubai. A
diplomatic row ensued when it emerged that the assassins had travelled
under the stolen identities of European and Australian citizens. There
was another international ruckus when Israeli commandos shot dead nine
people on a TURKISH SHIP with humanitarian supplies bound for Gaza.

The world cheered when all 33 men trapped underground for 69 days at a
mine in Chile were brought safely to the surface. But MINING accidents
in China, Russia, West Virginia, New Zealand and Turkey each killed
dozens of workers.

An election in BRITAIN saw Labour booted out of power after 13 years.
The Conservatives emerged as the biggest party but without an overall
majority. After a few tense days of talks, the Conservatives formed a
coalition (the first in Britain since the 1940s) with the Liberal
Democrats, who came third at the polls. The new government, led by
David Cameron, embarked on a radical programme of spending cuts.

JOYFUL AND TRIUMPHANT

In other big elections, Dilma Rousseff won the presidency in BRAZIL,
the first woman to do so. Julia Gillard became AUSTRALIA'S first female
prime minister after ousting Kevin Rudd; she kept the job after a
subsequent election. For the first time in 50 years CHILE elected a
conservative president, Sebastian Pinera. Mahinda Rajapaksa was
re-elected as SRI LANKA'S president; his opponent was arrested soon
after. Benigno Aquino won a presidential election in the PHILIPPINES;
he is the son of a late president, Corazon "Cory" Aquino. And Viktor
Yanukovich was elected president of UKRAINE, though Yulia Tymoshenko,
his opponent, mounted a brief challenge to the result in court.

POLAND'S president, Lech Kaczynski, was killed in a plane crash near
Smolensk, Russia, along with the head of Poland's central bank, senior
diplomats and military leaders. The ensuing presidential election was
won by Bronislaw Komorowski, who defeated Mr Kaczynski's twin brother,
Jaroslaw.

An explosion at a BP well in the Gulf of Mexico in April killed 11 men
and caused the world's biggest civilian OIL SPILL to date, before the
wellhead on the sea floor was finally sealed in September. The
catastrophe forced a halt to commercial fishing in the area and a
moratorium on drilling. The Obama administration faced sustained
criticism of its handling of the crisis. BP's share price slumped,
wiping out almost half its stockmarket value. In December America
launched a lawsuit against BP and other companies potentially liable
for the spill for billions of dollars in damages.

NORTH KOREA'S increasingly bellicose attitude towards SOUTH KOREA
rattled the world. The sinking of a South Korean navy ship with the
loss of 46 sailors was blamed on a torpedo attack by the North. Later
in the year the North launched an artillery barrage against a tiny
South Korean island. Kim Jong Un, the youngest son of Kim Jong Il,
North Korea's ailing Dear Leader, moved up the ranks as heir apparent.

Naoto Kan became JAPAN'S third prime minister within two years when
Yukio Hatoyama resigned after reneging on a promise to remove the
American marine base near Okinawa.

A recall of TOYOTA vehicles in America amid reportsof sticking
accelerator pedals proved to be a public-relations disaster for the
carmaker, compelling its boss to apologise at a congressional hearing.

There was more turmoil in THAILAND when red-shirted opposition
protesters set up an encampment in central Bangkok. After a two-month
stand-off the army moved in to clear the streets; 50 people were killed
in the resulting clashes.

Aung San Suu Kyi was released from house arrest by MYANMAR'S ruling
military junta. She had spent much of the past 20 years in detention
and was freed after Myanmar's first national election since 1990. The
ballot was rigged to favour the junta's candidates.

Goodluck Jonathan became president of NIGERIA when the ailing and
absent Umaru Yar'Adua was deemed too ill to continue in office (he died
in May). There was further bloody conflict along ethnic lines between
Christians and Muslims near the city of Jos.

Ethnic rioting in KYRGYZSTAN between Kyrgyz and Uzbeks in the south of
the country displaced hundreds of thousands and threatened to turn into
a civil war.

THE "HOT POTATO" EFFECT

Stockmarkets around the world had a bumpy year, none more so than the
Dow Jones Industrial Average, which plunged dramatically within a
matter of minutes on May 6th, only to recover the losses some 20
minutes later. An investigation found that a poorly executed
algorithmic trade was at the root of the "FLASH CRASH".

KRAFT FOODS bought CADBURY in a $19 billion takeover, one of the
biggest of the year, though the sale was contentious. After stepping
down as Cadbury's chairman, Roger Carr said that Britain had become
"the most open goal of almost any country...in terms of foreign
takeovers". Mr Carr becomes head of the Confederation of British
Industry in June.

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS...

Apple started selling the IPAD, a computer tablet that looked set to
revolutionise digital publishing. Apple overtook Microsoft as the
world's biggest technology company.

Among the year's SPORTING EVENTS, the winter Olympics were hosted by
Vancouver, the World Cup was held in South Africa (and won for the
first time by Spain) and the Commonwealth games took place in Delhi,
though some competitors threatened to pull out because of poor hygienic
conditions at the athletes' village. An annual event in England where
challengers chase a wheel of cheese down a hill was officially
cancelled on health-and-safety grounds.



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TheOilSpill

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2D2NBH/ecocentric.blogs.time.com/2010/09/19/oil-spill-the-well-is-dead//r:t